


Slip-up

by Nightchild78



Category: NCIS
Genre: Community: ncis_drabble, Friendship, Gen, Introspection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-13
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-05-20 05:47:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5993742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightchild78/pseuds/Nightchild78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hard-ass former Marines are not designed to express their feelings. Written for ncis drabble challenge #475 "Missing". Set during 1x20 "Missing". (Or my take on the reason behind Gibbs infamous reply in Missing and its consequences on Tony's relationship with his coworkers).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Slip-up

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ThePeachyMonkey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePeachyMonkey/gifts).



> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Author's note: A huge thank you to ThePeachyMonkey who was kind enough to beta it in the blink of an eye. You rock!

Tony had been missing for hours now. Though they had gathered plenty of evidence and pieced together the series of events which had led to Tony's abduction, they still didn't have a clue as to where he and Atlas were being held captive.

Gibbs tried his best to hide his inner turmoil, but the complete uncertainty about the fate of his agent was driving him crazy. Moreover, seeing Timothy McGee sitting at Tony's desk only served to feed his aggravation, even if he knew the young agent from Norfolk didn't mean any harm.

The desk across his own had been Tony's since the moment Gibbs had poached him, years ago, from Baltimore Police Department. To have someone else occupying it seemed to add insult to injury.

There would be only one reason for that desk to fall to somebody else, and it was if Tony was dead. Which, until proven otherwise, he wasn't.

By the time Abby was updating them on her latest discoveries about Carol Powers, Gibbs was more than ready to tell McGee to pack up and find another accommodation. Jeez, he was even ready to tell him to take his own desk instead. But before he had a chance to do so, his cell phone rang, informing him that Sacco's car had been located, and they were rushing towards their first real lead to their missing teammate.

NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS

Under his apparent impassiveness, Gibbs felt nothing but elated as they finally came back later with Tony; filthy, smelly and a bit scratched certainly, but fortunately safe and sound.

So, when Tony urged him to admit he had been worried, he didn't see any reason not to tell him the truth. Because, to him, Tony really was irreplaceable.

Unfortunately, as soon as he caught sight of McGee standing behind Tony's desk, the reality of how close they had been to losing Tony hit him hard. He couldn't stand to see him there a minute longer, and in a knee-jerk reaction, Gibbs found himself barking at the computer expert:

"Forget it, McGee. He's still alive."

As soon as the words passed his lips, he knew it had been a huge mistake. But it was too late. The hurt and puzzlement painted all over Tony's face were a glaring evidence of his slip-up. All he could do was to try to hide his blunder under the disguise of a (very) bad joke.

In vain. The damage was done. Gibbs could see Tony's insecurities come back at full speed. He would have gladly head slapped himself for being so stupid, if he had thought it could do any good.

Yet, having been married four times should have taught him not to try to think of two things that the same time. Men's brains were not designed for multi-tasking. Neither were, apparently, hard-ass former Marines for express their feelings.

End.


	2. Seeds of discord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened after Gibbs' infamous reply in the bullpen and how it irremediably affected Tony's relationship with his co-workers.

 

Fighting back nausea, Tony fumbled with the buttons of his shirt in his haste to get rid of his soiled clothes. All he wanted was to jump in the shower and wash off the filth and stench of the sewers.

He was about to take his pants off when he felt a presence behind him. Whipping around, he came face to face with a fairly flustered Kate, and couldn't help but to let out a sigh.

"Kate, what are you doing here?" He forced a cocky smile on his lips, pointing at the door behind her. "I don't know if you have noticed, but these are the men's showers."

Kate awkwardly shuffled her feet.

"I know, but I need to talk to you."

Tony threw his ruined shirt in a garbage can and sat on a bench to take off his shoes and socks.

"Listen, it's not that I don't appreciate your company, but right now all I want is to climb into that cubicle and scrub my skin raw."

Kate averted her eyes, a hint of pink coloring her cheeks as the Catholic school girl in her tried to conjure the vision of a very naked Tony lathering himself under the shower.

"Yes, of course. I… I won't be long. It's just that... it was a joke, you know. He was really worried sick. I don't know why he said what he did, but..."

Tony gave Kate a puzzled look.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

Kate took a deep breath before speaking again, this time less hurriedly.

"What Gibbs said to McGee after he told you that you were irreplaceable. He didn't mean it. Well, I don't know what he meant exactly. But I'm sure he didn't want to imply that McGee could replace you if you were dead. And about the fact that McGee was at your desk. It was just a question of convenience. It's not that..."

Tony stood up and held Kate gently by the upper arms to stop her rambling.

"Whoa, whoa. Calm down, Miss Over Excitement," he quipped. "You're gonna snap an artery."

Looking her straight in the eyes, he carried on.

"I'm very grateful to you for being so worried about my well-being, Kate. But you can stop twisting yourself in knots. It's just a piece of governmental furniture we're talking about, not the throne of England. I don't own it and I really don't care who is sitting at it. As for Gibbs, I wouldn't have lasted all this time with him if I had taken everything he said to heart. So don't make a fuss over nothing."

Kate gave Tony a doubtful glance.

"So, you're not mad?"

Tony cocked an eyebrow and shrugged.

"Why would I be?"

"You're okay?" Kate asked skeptically.

"Peachy."

Tony let go of Kate's arms and took a step backwards.

"Now, if you don't mind. I'd really, really like to take that shower. As you so rightly pointed out earlier, I stink."

Kate nodded and reluctantly headed to the door.

"Yes, of course. See you tomorrow, then?"

"Yes. See you tomorrow," Tony favored Kate with his usual dazzling smile, but it faded as soon as she walked out the door.

With a stony face, he threw away his trousers and turned on the tap. Stepping under the steamy spray, he shook his head.

God, poor Kate was really the worst profiler he had ever met.

First her, and now McGee. Did she really think he was so stupid and gullible that he hadn't seen it coming?

Though Tony might act like a goof most of the time, that didn't mean he was an idiot. He knew all too well how one nail drives out another and there was no doubt that he was about to become a second best for Gibbs. He hadn't missed the gleam in the former Marine's eye whenever he looked at Kate and McGee. The same gleam he had seen shine years ago, in Baltimore. The same he could see now slowly fading as far as he was concerned.

He didn't really feel threatened by Kate. But he was fully aware that he was slowly becoming an outmoded model compared to younger and more graduated agents like McGee.

It was obviously a lost battle, but he didn't intend to give up so easily. If the kid wanted his job, he would have to earn it. Not that he had anything against him personally, but Tony had worked too hard, and for too long to be where he was. He had no intention of giving up without a fight.

Tony had no family, no serious relationship since Wendy left him, and no real social relations outside of work. His job as Gibbs' SFA was the only thing that made sense in his life. If he lost that, he would lose everything.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm considering writing one last part dealing with Tony's departure.


	3. Second wind - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A possible way Tony could have left NCIS and a glimpse of his future life (with a dash of romance, because Tony deserves to be happy).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, faithful readers. After a long and painful writer's block, I seem to be back on the horse and I intend to finish all my WIP, including Providence.  
> Due to the unexpected length of this chapter, it will be posted in two parts.
> 
> Today is the birthday of my dear and talented friend Juliet (aka ThePeachyMonkey) and, I decided it would be a nice gift to offer her the final chapter of Slip-up instead to the usual webcard. I hope you'll like it. Happy birthday sweetie, from the bottom of my heart!

Feet crossed on his large mahogany desk, Tony leaned back in his chair, absentmindedly fiddling with the business card in his hands. It still amazed him that an item so small could at the same time be both the symbol of his greatest achievement and a reminder of his most disgraceful failure.

Tony lowered his eyes and glanced at the words elegantly engraved on the thick white card adorned with two discreet silver vertical lines.

_“AD Consulting- Anthony D. DiNozzo, CEO”._

Knowing Gibbs’ utter disdain for pompous titles, the former Marine certainly wouldn't have missed an opportunity to favor Tony with one of his famous scathing remarks.

Tony’s mouth twisted into a bitter rictus. Years ago, the mere idea of his mentor's disapproval would have bothered him to no end. Not anymore. In fact, Tony couldn't care less now.

“AD Consulting” was his baby. A flourishing company he had set up from scratch and which he could be proud of. Making the best use of his years in law enforcement and military field, his job now consisted of providing a tidily selected clientele with a wide range of services, including security consulting and background checks, along with deep character investigation.

After only one year, the company was already making profits and kept growing nicely, with no less than a dozen people working under Tony. And this was all due to his hard work and personal skills.

Nobody would have bet a cent on him when he started it, so he didn’t see any reason to humble brag now. 

Tony's eyes turned towards the large window of his office and the snowy landscape outside. His offices might not be particularly big or luxurious, but they offered a nice view of the banks of the Potomac, which usually managed to impress his visitors.

It was the middle of January and, for a moment, Tony lost himself in contemplation of the big blocks of ice carried along by the river, as his musings brought him back a year ago.

In all honesty, he didn't remember which snarky remark or umpteenth humiliation finally sent him over the edge. All he remembered was waking up one day in the wee hours of the morning, overcome with the realization that he couldn’t keep going like this, unless he wanted to end up insane or, worse, dead.

His relationship with Gibbs had only deteriorated through the years, going from distant to sour, and it was pretty obvious that the older man had no intention of resigning any time soon. By the time, Gibbs would be forced to leave active service, Tony knew he would be too old himself to take charge of the MCRT. He was perfectly aware that McGee would be a better candidate, younger and entitled with Vance's support. He didn’t hold a grudge against the younger man for that. But, on the other hand, he refused to sit through the ultimate humiliation of a new demotion. Even another leading position would have looked like a disgrace, and anyway, he truly doubted the Director would have supported any application from him. 

All things considered, he was at a dead-end, and it seemed high time to make good use of the trust fund his mother had left him. After all, he had enough years of service for an early retirement, and his scarred lungs provided the perfect excuse to leave.

Unsurprisingly, Vance was more than willing to accept Tony's resignation. The bastard even managed to look magnanimous by half-heartedly offering to recommend him. But Tony politely declined his offer. He didn't need pity, least of all from a man who had never respected him.

The news of Tony's retirement came as a bombshell, generating varied reactions.

Abby was very upset, mostly because she refused to see her well-oiled little world spin out of its axis. For days, she tried to coax Tony into changing his mind, until she finally realized it was to no avail and gave up. Since then, they hadn’t seen each other much, and though it saddened him to see her hold a grudge against him, he wasn’t going to apologize for merely living his life.

Ellie and Tim seemed genuinely sorry for Tony, and he couldn’t help wondering if they were the only ones at NCIS who kept expecting him to take over from Gibbs after all those years.

Ducky and Jimmy were more supportive. Sad that he left, but also happy and thrilled to see him fly away from the stale air of the MCRT. They were also the only ones with whom he still hung out regularly.

As for Gibbs, true to form, he had shown no reaction at the news of Tony’s early retirement. 

Their last meeting in Gibbs' basement was anything but pleasant, and only served to drive the last nail in the coffin of their relationship. As the varnish finally cracked, things were said that none of them could ever forget nor forgive. Among other things, Gibbs accused him of letting down his team for the lure of profit. To that, Tony couldn’t help but retort that this team had never been his and would never have been anyway. After all, Gibbs had made a point of reminding him that at every opportunity.

There had been a lot of shouting, and a few tools thrown across the room. When Tony finally left the house after getting years of frustration and anger off his chest, he knew with absolute certainty that it was the last time the two men would speak to each other. Which, indeed, had proven to be true. 

A soft rasp at the door snapped Tony out of his reverie. He looked up and saw his secretary, Judith, standing at the doorway. The light in her office was on, making her white hair glow like a halo around her head. _"Saint Judith, prey for us,"_ he chuckled inwardly. 

Without a word, the older woman walked into the room and switched on Tony's desk lamp.

“You're going to strain your eyes, my boy,” she said in an affectionate tone, making Tony realize that the night had fallen and the room was now plunged in the dark.

“What would I do without you?” Tony teased her with a half-smile.

“Well...” she said, pretending to think hard. “I guess, you'd forget to sleep, and to eat and then you'd slowly work yourself to death.”

He returned her smile and sat up, putting the card back down.

“You’re a true mother hen, you know that?”

She gently squeezed his shoulder and Tony reveled in her touch.

Judith Baker was a gem, and Tony had no idea of how he would have succeeded without her precious help and support. Before she retired, she was one of Tom Morrow's assistants at Homeland for years. Smart and energetic, she was divorced for a few years and her only daughter was living with her family in Michigan. It only took her a couple of months to realize that idleness wasn’t her cup of tea. When Morrow told her one of his friends was looking for a part-time assistant for his newly built company, she didn’t hesitate for long before accepting the offer. 

Tony knew he would never be grateful enough to the former Director of NCIS for playing matchmaker. Morrow was one of the few people who had shown genuine respect to him along his career, and the only one whom Tony had sought help from after he left. Not only did Morrow introduce Tony to Judith, but he also provided him with his first clients, thereby giving him a chance to prove himself.

Some offers of help were less welcome, though. Such as the one from his father. 

As expected, as soon as Senior heard his son was going into business, he had tried to get involved, offering his contacts and “experience.” But Tony politely yet firmly declined. He wanted his business to be 100% clean and legal, which would be nearly impossible, knowing his father’s shady acquaintances.

Senior had been pretty upset, and had given Tony the cold shoulder since then. But it didn’t really matter. For once, Tony was doing something for himself. Not to please his father, or to fulfill Gibbs’ unattainable expectations.

The time for letting others decide for him was over.

“The person from Ricoletti Inc. is here,” Judith informed Tony. “Do you want me to stay?”

Tony shook his head.

“No, thanks. Just a first contact meeting. Go home. It’s already late.”

She nodded and affectionately patted his shoulder.

“All right. I'll tell them you’ll be ready in a minute,” she said before heading, as quiet as a mouse, to the door.

“Goodnight Tony.”

“’Night, Judy.”

Standing up, Tony straightened his tie and checked his reflection in the window. Not bad for a retired cop. Surprisingly enough, he was in better shape now than when he was still in active service. Less junk food and more time to exercise had helped him lose weight and get back in shape. Taking a deep breath, he squared his shoulders and mentally prepared himself for his meeting. 

Ricoletti Inc. was the largest importing company of Italian food products on the East Coast, and to have them as a client would be very good publicity for AD Consulting. The assistant who had set the appointment hadn’t told him much, but according to what Tony had managed to dig up so far, it seemed that Giorgio Ricoletti, the founder of the company, was a self-made man, and someone who wasn’t easily taken in. Whatever the purpose of this appointment, Tony doubted middling responses would be tolerated.

With one last look in his improvised mirror, he plastered his best self-assured smile on his face and strode to the door, determined to win over his new client.

_To be continued_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second part will be posted later this week. I hope you'll like it.


End file.
